I just sit and shake my head. I mean damn, I am 42 years old. I raised three kids all by myself. I have been married twice (still in the second one). I am a grandmother of four. Why do I get sh** for doing what I want to do?
Your wasting your time, your wasting your money, what do you think your doing? I hear this everyday. It is making me sick.
If you don't like what I am doing, please leave my house! Leave the space where I get my air. Just leave me the hell alone!
Why do people feel that they can say and do anything they want but when you get ready to do it, all hell has to break out? I guess I was raised in different times and my Aunt taught me when to speak & when to just let things go. I was raised that you respect your elders at all costs. Taught that somethings are better left unsaid. My grandfather told me once,"if you smile, they have no idea what your thinking". That is how I live.
With my own kids, I have learned (the hard way) to let go. They need to make their own mistakes. Once I got the basics down, it has been heaven. I don't want to be all up in their business.
I feel that I don't need someone always in my space, face or bed! I can do bad all by myself. I am trying to better myself. I have goals I must reach at all costs. If I lose people along the way, then they were really not suppose to be there. If you want to support me, fine. But if you don't, that's okay too.
I was there when they did their thing. I was there when the sh** hit the fan. I had mop, broom, garbage bag ready. Sometimes I even had the checkbook out with pen in hand. Just because I feel that I need to let go of some of the strees and bull that was in my life, I am wrong? No, I am not the one who is wrong. Things have never been more right! I have let go of alot of things and if my happiness depends on letting go of even MORE, bye bye, see ya later, peace be with you! 2009 is all about what Arnita wants, feels and needs.
Maybe I sound a little harsh. But no one is gonna break my spirit, determination, or my faith in myself. I know I can. I know I will. It may not be tomorrow, but it will happen!!
4 days ago